By Darla Grey

Everything you’ve ever wanted to know about period sex

Just because your Aunt Flo is knockin’, doesn’t mean your bed (or couch, or shower) can’t be rockin’. While period sex has long been associated with a general ‘ick’-factor, we at Knude Society think it’s time to change this undeserved bad rap. 

If you’re not sure whether you’re ready to fully embrace sex while menstruating, we’ve gone ahead and researched a few good reasons to reconsider. It might just become your favourite time of the month — period.  

First things first: Period sex is safe (and healthy!) 

If you’re worried about your health and safety in regards to period sex, you’ve got very little to worry about. While of course you want to take regular safe sex precautions when it comes to STDs and pregnancy, there’s nothing in period sex that makes it any more dangerous or less dangerous than regular ol’ s-e-x. 

Not only is it doctor-approved, but there are actually many benefits associated with period sex. These include: 

  • Reduced cramping 

  • Less headaches 

  • Lower levels of stress

  • Better sleep 

  • Increased lubrication (self-explanatory) 

  • Shorter periods (hello, orgasmic uterine contractions) 

Now that you know why period sex is so bloody great (get it?), we’ve got some tips and tricks to help you have the best experience possible. 

Lay down the law 

As with any sexual activity, open and honest communication is key to getting the most out of period sex. 

Because of the stigma surrounding it, you’ll definitely want to have a conversation around period sex before the heat of the moment hits. Take some time to discover your partner’s thoughts about sex during menstruation, and use the opportunity to share your own feelings. 

Regardless of whether you’re part of a hetero couple, a same-sex couple, or consider yourself anywhere else on the spectrum, everyone has different feelings when it comes to period sex. Because of this, you’ll want to set some clear boundaries. Some things to consider: 

  • Are all partners comfortable with and interested in period sex? Rate your personal interest and comfort on a scale from 1 - 10 to get a clear picture of everyone’s feelings. 

  •  Are there certain days that change each partner’s comfort level? For example, perhaps one partner isn’t comfortable with a heavy-flow, day one of the period, but maybe a lighter day four is fine with them. 

  • Are any body parts off-limits? Maybe oral sex isn’t in the cards for all partners during this time, but penetrative sex (like with fingers, penis, or sex toys, oh my!) gets the go-ahead. Or, maybe if the menstruating partner has breasts, they might be tender and painful, and the last thing they want is a little fondling. It’s all good info to have before you begin. 

  • Are there any toys or tools that could make the experience better? Maybe a tampon could help keep blood under control for all partners’ comfort levels, or perhaps using a toy to avoid direct contact would make things even more enjoyable for all. Would there be increased enthusiasm for period sex if a dental dam was used? Remember: if any partners’ are using a tampon or menstrual cup, they’ll want to remove it prior to any vaginal penetration. That’s not a lesson anyone needs to learn the hard way. 

Keep it clean 

Depending on everyone’s comfort levels, there are probably some cleanliness measures you’ll want to take before you part the red sea. 

Throw in the towel 

This might be period sex 101, but if you’re planning on having messy sex on a soft surface like your bed or sofa, you’ll probably want to lay down a towel before beginning. 

This isn’t just reserved for period sex, either. For example, you might not want to get juices of any kind on your new £200 linen sheet set. Or, you might be into squirting but not into ruining a perfectly good mattress. Perhaps you just like a little food play once in a while. 

Reserve a towel for these special sexy occasions — but just make sure it’s kept off-limits for guests. 

Great barriers 

As you may have discovered in your boundaries chat, not everyone is into touching blood. Whether the aversion is to the face and mouth or any other part of the body, there are solutions that can ensure everyone has a great — and satisfying — time. 

As one option, a dental dam provides a barrier between a mouth and a vagina or anus. 

When a person is menstruating, the dental dam helps keep some of that blood away from the giving partner’s mouth during oral sex (or whatever else you want to do down there). The recipient gets the pleasure, while the giver can keep their mouth and face clean from any blood. Disclaimer: While they protect from many STDs, dental dams don’t protect against HPV, Herpes, or pubic lice, so just be sure you’ve read and understand these general safe sex risks before you begin. 

If you don’t have a dental dam on-hand you can also use a condom as a makeshift solution. Simply cut the end off of the condom and down one side of it to create an instant dental dam. There’s probably a Martha Stewart tutorial on this somewhere. 

If you’re in a real pinch, you can also use a piece of plastic food wrap (also known as saran wrap or cling wrap) to act as a barrier between period blood and another partner’s face and mouth. A warning, though, that you might never look at your lunchtime sandwich the same again. 

Location, location, location

Two words: shower sex. If you’re looking to get down and dirty while also staying fresh and clean, a shower is the perfect place to get your period sex on. 

Lean up against the shower wall  while getting it on in standing position, or enjoy some all-fours floor action. Whatever position(s) you choose, the second best part of shower sex comes once all the fun is over. Simply turn on your tap to rinse away any period blood from your bodies and the shower. Once you’ve caught your breath, that is. 

Now that you know the ins and outs of period sex, you can start looking forward to that previously dreaded time of the month. The countdown is on.